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How to Overcome Shyness Around Women – 5 Tips on Being Able to Confidently Talk to Women

Friday, August 27th, 2010

There are definitely varying degrees of shyness that men will exhibit with women. Some guys have no problems at all approaching and talking to women, and others are utterly terrified of even approaching a woman that they do not already know, or one that they do not know very well. And a lot of guys are really somewhere in the middle.

Sometimes they can confidently start a conversation with a woman, and then there are other times when they just cannot seem to make it happen.

I am going to kind of “target” this article at guys that are really uncomfortable when talking to women, and depending on where you find yourself, you may be able to pick up a few things here and there, even if you are more in the middle, so to speak.

First of all, I would like you to think of where the fear comes from. Was there EVER a time in your life that you did not have any fear about talking to women, or was it always that way?

I know for myself, that there have been times when it seemed like I could approach any woman that I wanted to and I did not even think twice about it, and there have been just as many times when I felt as though I could not even start a conversation with a butt ugly chick.

Obviously in those situations, where the woman is not attractive, it is not a situation where you are intimidated by her looks.

For many guys, the fear comes from the “unkown.”

What do I mean by this?

At many different points in your life, I can assume that the majority of your social circle, or your social network has consisted of mostly other men. Don’t count female family members, and I bet that the majority of the time, your social circle has mostly been other guys.

So, right there, you kind of have a disconnection from women, and you probably are not really sure what to talk about, and you have no real reference points in your mind that shows you that you can easily start a conversation with a woman.

Now, I can also bet that there have been times when your social circle did have at least a couple of females in there. Maybe it was in high school or college. During those times, I will also bet that you found it at least a little bit easier to talk to women.

Why?

Because you had those reference points in your mind, you have examples and memories of conversations with women, and that was enough to tell you that you DID know how to talk to women, at least on some level.

The reason why I am digging into this area, is because most men that have a REALLY hard time talking to women… don’t talk to women that often.

And that is the source of a lot of the fear and the awkwardness, it’s the inexperience.

So, here are 5 tips on how to overcome shyness with women and be able to confidently talk to women:


1. Become friends with at least one female.

And I do mean friends and nothing more. You want to introduce some females into your life and your social circle. The change that you can make just by doing this alone can be profound. One guy that I worked with took this one bit of advice and kind of ran with it. He wound up making friends with quite a few women, and suddenly he saw that he could talk to women, no problems at all.

He built new references and experiences in his mind, ones that he could pull from at any time, and realize that he DID have the skills to talk to any woman that he wanted. The result? He started dating more women in one year than he had in the previous 5 years.

2. Approach at least one woman per week that you do not know and start a conversation, no matter how small.

Eventually, if you really want to get this area of your life “mastered,” then I suggest that you up it to one woman per day. The point of doing this is not to get a date or a phone number, at least not at first. It’s about overcoming the “shock” of approaching women that you do not know, and starting a conversation with her.

Soon, whatever fears that you might have will start to subside, and you will realize that it can actually be kind of easy to start a conversation with a woman, even when you don’t know her at all.

3. Now that you have started to get female friends and started to talk to women that you do not know, start to build up for something more.

Once you have a female friend, and hopefully more than just one in your network, and you have started to approach women that you do not know and get a conversation going, it’s time to UP the ante. You now want to start at least getting some phone numbers from women.

When you approach a woman that you do not know and the conversation seems to be fun and maybe even a little flirty, ask her for her phone number. Sure, she might say NO, and she might just move on after that. The point is to get used to asking for her number so that way, the shock of doing that will just wear off.

4. After the first one or two or maybe even three women, you have probably gotten at least one phone number, and now, you want to get comfortable making plans or dates.

Obviously, you are not approaching women just to have a stash of phone numbers, right? The whole point in getting the phone number is to work up to a date with her, and of course, maybe even more than that. So, you want to get used to talking to her on the phone, at least enough to make plans.

Depending on your personality, a short conversation may be better and more effective than a longer one. The more silent pauses there are, the more it will seem like she would be bored on a date with you. So, if that is your personality, make it short, touch base with her, and get her to meet you somewhere. My favorite thing has always been to get a woman to hop on the train and head into Manhattan, yours may be different.

5. This is probably the MOST important tip of all– Think of EVERY FAILED ATTEMPT AS JUST A PRACTICE RUN.

If you think of every rejection or every conversation that leads to nowhere as just being a test run, a practice, then it will not have as big of an impact on you as if you think of it as being just another sign that you suck with women. You probably DON’T suck with women as much as you think you do, and when it starts to “click” and you start to get more and more dates with women, then you will look back on all of those failed attempts as just being either funny or a lesson learned and nothing more.

There is no shortage of women that are worth dating out there, so don’t have the mentality that you let one get away and that you might never get another opportunity like that. Look around, beautiful women are everywhere, and every day you can end up coming across a woman that is even better than the last.

Even though it can be intimidating at first, and you might think that you have nothing worth saying, the more times that you get out there, you will discover how to talk to women in a way that builds intense attraction.

Click Here to Discover Strategies and Techniques on How to Approach, Attract, and Seduce Women that Most Men Will NEVER Know…

Copyright © 2010 Chris Tyler All Rights Reserved.

Posted in How to Talk to Women | Comments Off

Shy Guy Dating- How to Get Over Being Shy and Instead Be The Guy That Gets The Girl!

Tuesday, April 6th, 2010

Shy Guy Dating | Shy Around Women | How to Get Over Being Shy Around Women

There are many different levels of shyness around women that some guys have.  Actually,  to some extent ALL guys have a level of shyness around women.  For some,  the woman has to be an Angelina Jolie type to make them feel shy and for others,  just about ANY woman will make them close off and feel uncomfortable.

There’s nothing wrong with being shy around women,  unless it gets in the way of you feeling good about yourself and confident enough to be able to approach a woman when you feel attracted to her.

Click Here to Download Your FREE Guide to Attract and Seduce Women

If you feel like your social life needs a jolt and the shyness around women is TOO much,  then I will show you a few tricks to get over this.

There’s one thing that you HAVE TO remember,  though.  Just reading words on a screen are NOT going to change your life.  Taking action on them will.

I’ve encountered guys that say they already know all of the tricks to attract women,  yet they end up staying home on the weekend when they would much rather be out with a woman,  having fun,  and hopefully ending the night with some mind numbing sex.

Here are some tips to get over your shyness with women:

1.  You have to get comfortable speaking to women.

One of the problems that shy guys tend to have is that feel like talking to a woman is somehow on some higher level than talking to a guy or talking to a female relative.  The mind trick to use is to get yourself to realize that she is NO different at all,  and to realize that you probably won’t have a hard time finding at least some common ground to get started with.  Once you get the conversation going,  it’s not nearly as intimidating as it is to just get yourself to make the move and talk to her.

2.  Start interacting with women that you are not attracted to,  just to get used to flirting and talking with them.

If you lack much of any experience at all with women,  then you have to go and get yourself some.  Now,  I’m not saying that you have to date or sleep with women that you don’t find attractive.  But,  you do have to get used to talking and flirting with them.  You will most likely find that you don’t feel much of any pressure at all,  especially because you already know that you are NOT trying to get with her.  The goal is to just get used to being around women and knowing how to talk and flirt with them without feeling like you are under pressure or feeling any intimidation at all.

3.  Take baby steps.

If you are really shy with women,  then maybe going out tonight and approaching a woman that you would consider to be a ’10′ is just too much.  So,  take it in baby steps.  Go out and approach an average looking woman.  Talk to her,  flirt with her,  maybe get her to dance.  Hell,  even go for her phone number.  Whatever way you want to see it,  you cannot expect to just overnight become so comfortable that you can approach a model type and have no hesitations or reservations.  It’s just not going to happen like that.

4.  Get a group of female friends.

I find that most men that are really too shy with women have either none or only one or two real female friends.  So,  women almost seem foreign to them.  You can easily find a couple of girls to just be friends with and get used to going out with them.  Not only will this help you in getting over being shy with women,  but it also helps when you go out looking to pick up a woman.  If you go out and you have a group of women around you,  other women will notice you and they will automatically think that you must be a cool guy that they should get to know.  It’s simple social proof,  but,  it works.

5.  Approach as many women as you can,  as quickly as you can.

If you want to get over being shy with women really FAST,  then you want to approach as many women as you can.  We become desensitized to anything the more that we come into contact with it.  The same reason why young kids that play violent video games become desensitized to violent acts,  can actually help you with women.  When you approach as many women as possible,  by the tenth or twentieth time,  it becomes nothing at all to you.

Click Here to Download Your FREE Guide to Attract and Seduce Women

Copyright (c) 2010.  Chris Tyler and GetURGirl.com  All Rights Reserved.

Posted in Dating Tips for Men | Comments Off

Body Language Flirting With a Woman

Sunday, March 7th, 2010

You tend to be naturally shy around women, especially when the woman is very attractive. It’s funny isn’t it. How a beautiful woman can make you instantly clam up and crawl back into your shell, afraid that she might reject you for some reason or another. What’s even more peculiar is how this is so common amongst guys, yet they won’t even share this feeling with their buddies.

Click Here to Get Over Your Shyness With Women

When you are shy around women, it can be hard to work up the nerve to even approach a woman, much less flirt with her. Of course, if you don’t get things moving and start flirting with a woman, then you are not going to ever get the reward of taking her out on a date or having her call you on the phone late at night. You don’t really prefer to watch awful late night shows over talking to a beautiful woman, do you?

No man would. At least no straight, single man would prefer this.

Being shy around women means that you need to gain confidence in some way. And really, there is no better way than learning how female attraction really works, what makes a woman fall for a guy, and knowing that you can possess those qualities and those skills and remove just about any and all fear of rejection that you might feel when you are around a gorgeous, sexy woman.

One of the most important skills that ANY man can possess is knowing how to use body language to flirt with a woman. Most human interaction, most communication between a man and a woman happens without the use of any words at all. Your body language, what it says to her and how she responds will be more important than anything else. When you can use body language flirting with a woman, then you can make her fall in love with you, as she sees that you are the ONE guy that just seems to get her.

And that creates a STRONG sense of attraction with a woman, the kind that she will NOT be able to resist.

Here are some body language flirting tips that you should use on a woman that you adore:

1. First of all, you want your body language to tell her that you are confident.

As long as your body language tells a woman that you have confidence when you around her, she will believe it. See, most body language interpretation happens on a subconscious level. She will be able to notice right away that you move like a man that is confident, even if a part of you is feeling nervous about being around her. You want to make a woman feel like she is secure and safe when she is around you, and confident body language will make her feel this way.

2. You have to be able to work your way close to her.

One of the most powerful ways to attract and flirt with a woman using body language is to get close to her. Not only does this help to escalate things with her, but you can also get a more accurate read on her and what she is feeling. If you are getting close to her and she seems to be pulling away, then you have not created ENOUGH attraction with her yet. She doesn’t feel secure and safe enough being around you and you have to step up your flirting with her a bit. You never want to try to aggressively get close to her, as this will make her feel really uncomfortable around you.

3. Get physical with her in SMALL steps.

Some guys seem to think that being more aggressive with a woman is a way to assert dominance and she will then respect you more and thus, be much more attracted to you. This is true but only to a certain point. If you are too aggressive when you are physically flirting with her, then you can turn from her prince charming into a royal creep very quickly in her eyes. You want to make sure that you take everything in steps, so make small moves to get physical with her. Things like touching her on the small of her back, or on the inside of her knee all work to build attraction with a woman, without taking it too far and too quick.

4. When you make eye contact with her, you want it to seem natural and like there is chemistry with her.

Being able to make meaningful eye contact with a woman and hold her in a gaze can escalate things very quickly. You can give her that feeling of falling on love with you at first sight, as long as you are doing it right. What you never want to make the mistake of doing, is, appearing like you are staring at her. Women don’t like to feel like a man is staring at them. They want to feel like they are being looked at lovingly and with affection instead.

Want to learn more *secrets* on how to use body language flirting with a woman?

Click HERE to download Your FREE E-book and learn how to attract any woman you DESIRE!

Copyright (c) 2010 Chris Tyler All Rights Reserved.

Posted in How to Flirt With Women | Comments Off